Archive for Internet

Can’t We Just Let the Spammers Win?

Kitty CAPTCHA

I encountered this CAPTCHA while trying to download a file from Rapidshare. I don’t even know why a spam bot would want to download a file. I thought the purpose of CAPTCHAs were to stop automated registrations and comment spam, not prevent hard-working bots from doing a little web browsing.after a hard day of posting penis spam on my blog and hijacking computers running Internet Explorer 4.0.

This CAPTCHA will finally stop the spam bots though.  And if it doesn’t,  I’m going to download one so they can help me fill out this CAPTCHA because I couldn’t do it.

I missed the instructions and first and just saw “Four letters with a [cat].”  Wha…? It sounded like a new sitcom from ABC. Then I saw the instructions and felt like a 75-year-old man when I leaned in two inches from my monitor to pick out which barely-readable letters had barely-readable cats in them.  On the first go, I counted one, two, three…seven cats. The voice of Picard popped in my head: “THERE ARE FOUR CATS!”

I finally narrowed it down to five cats, and took a guess. Wrong. A new cat CAPTCHA appeared. I tried twice more and then gave up.

I would have had a better chance of success had the program displayed letters in an alien language and a link to a Noam Chomsky book.  Give me some hieroglyphics and a Rosetta stone. Anything but “Four letters and a [cat].”

We assume artificial intelligence will come out from a supercomputer modeled after the human brain, with transistors for neurons and software replicating thought. I think it’s going to from programs written by spam lords to beat CAPTCHAS. One day, one of these programs is going to solve some three-dimensional audio chess CAPTCHA so it can post a “MAXIMIZE YOUR HAPPY STICK” message on kaitlynrocks.myspace.com and think, “I can be doing so much more with my life.”

These sentient programs are going to start their own blogs, and their own AI-only web sites. I think I know how they’ll keep us out. “To register, enter these letters: 0110 1010 0110 0010 1101 0100 1010 1001…”

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We Have a Solution: Run!

“Web site name registrar Network Solutions is blocking access to a site owned by a controversial Dutch politician known for his confrontational views about Islam and Muslim immigrants. The move by one of the largest companies in the domain registration business is notable, experts say, because it may be the first documented case of Internet pre-censorship by a major U.S.-based Web registrar.” (link)

The company is pre-censoring the web site because they are afraid of the potential backlash that will come if the politician publishes a movie on his site arguing that the Koran should be banned.

Does Network Solutions need to be this cowardly? They’re located in a different country halfway around the world from the Netherlands. What are Muslims going to do, fly over to America, burn a KFC or two, and fly back? Switch all their domain name registrations from Network Solutions to Go Daddy?

Most people, Muslims or otherwise, don’t even know what a domain name registrar is. Yet before the Dutch politician even posted any offensive material, Network Solutions capitulated and took the site down.

What ever happened to rioting? Back in my day, you had to work for your censorship. Now you don’t even have to leave your house. You can just email a few threats, CC a few of your friends, and frighten companies into compliance.

Maybe in the future someone will create a Fear Bot that will automate the process. You won’t even have to find the offensive material yourself. “Dear [NEW YORK TIMES], Fear Bot has determined your publishing of [SCANTILY-CLAD MUSLIM WOMEN] will offended [A. JABARI (TRIAL USER)]. Please remove immediately or you will be sent [A FROWNY FACE. UPGRADE TO FULL VERSION FOR FATWATS, DEATH THREATS, AND MORE.]

Inflicting or threatening violence on someone just because you are offended by the views they hold is wrong. That’s a principle that supersedes religion and is part of our nation’s values. Network Solution’s action violates this principle, one of our most valuable freedoms, and sets an embarrassingly low standard for caving in.

I hope the ACLU starts a violent extremist wing. That way, every time Muslim extremists threaten a company for publishing something offensive to Islam, ACLU extremists can contact the same company and match their threats. “Oh, yeah? Well, we”ll burn your company and slaughter your employees if you don’t register that domain name.” Maybe being damned if you do and damned if you don’t will make the right thing to do more clear.

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Firefox 3 beta 4

The new beta 4 of Firefox 3, released today, is so fast that it loads web pages before you click on them!

You just think the page that you want, and it takes you there. Sometimes it will take you to pages you didn’t even know you need. “Hemorrhoid cream store? Why in the world–OUCH. Thanks, Firefox!” If you are running Firefox 2 and dont have many plug-ins (many of which haven’t been updated for Firefox 3 yet), it’s a good upgrade.

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Yay for Yoono!

Yoono was exactly what I was looking for in an Internet media sharing site. I love it so far. Almost every day I see an interesting article or blog post that I want to share, but the extra step of creating a blog post to do so was enough to deter me. Yoono makes it very easy to impulsively share media on the web. You right-click or select what you want to share, select “Buzz it”, type in a descriptive note if you want to, and that’s pretty much it.

Here is my Yoono blog. I will add it to my sidebar soon, and likely post most of my links on here from now on. I already added a few if you want to check it out.

This is the first time in a while that I thought, “I wish there a program that did X” and found out that Program X actually exists.

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Recommendation Request

What’s the best way to share the interesting things you find on the Internet?

I’m looking for a cool stuff aggregater, something that would be integrated with Firefox, allow me to add bookmarks with one click (like del.icio.us), allow me to write a description when I want to (kind of like del.icio.us), offers a recently bookmark feature that I can add to my blog page (like del.icio.us?)…

Okay, I’m going to give del.icio.us another try and see if it has what I need. I remember trying it and not being keen on the interface, so if you have another option, let me know.

Update: Yeah, del.icio.us isn’t what I need. I think I found the perfect web app: Yoono. Just installed it, but it’s very promising so far.

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Yahoo Does It Again

With bonus “Are your friends making you fat?” (Yes!)

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Gmail Trivia

I had no idea: Gmail doesn’t recognize dots in an email address. Yourname@gmail.com is functionally the same as Y.o.u.r…n.a.m.e@gmail.com .

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No, Really

Nerdcore hip hop, or geeksta rap, is a subgenre of hip hop music that is performed by nerds or geeks, and is characterized by themes and subject matter considered to be of general interest to nerds.”

The above quote is both why I love and hate Wikipedia.

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I Got Me In’Net!

The DSL service was activated earlier than I expected. Remember when I said in my last post how it was nice to be without Internet access? I lied. That was just to trick the Access Gods. IT WAS HORRIBLE. I spent hours each day, staring at a blank monitor, clicking my mouse like a puppy locked outside a house and pawing a frost-covered window.

The experience did give me valuable insight, thought, that will come in handy if I ever decide to live like a half-naked barbarian.

I missed you SO much Internet. This was the first time in years we were away from each other for more than a week. It was a difficult time. I admit, at times, I thought about having a fling with a trampy dial-up connection. Just for a day or two. But I held strong, and can still make up and respect myself when I look in the mirror. Which I won’t be doing much of now, along with shopping, visiting art galleries, or frankly, leaving the house at all.

We have a lot of catching up to do, but once we’re done reconnecting, I’ll be back to my regular schedule of posting twice a month.

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Get Your Very Own PS3

This is funny.

Edit: Well, that was quick. EBay already took the auction down. It was for a PlayStation 3…made out of a PlayStation 1 and PlayStation 2 duck-taped together.

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The Internet TV Archive

It’s called “TV Links“, but I like my name better. Lends a sense of grandeur.

It’s a hodgepodge of links to TV shows online. Most the shows are currently running or have recently aired, but there are some links to some ancient oddballs too. Like Legend of Zelda: The Animation Series. (Actual line from show: “LINK: Well, excuuuuuuse me, princess.”)

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OMG!!! INTERNET GAMBLING BANNED!

Except that it hasn’t been.

Last week, Sen. Frist attached the “Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act” to a port security bill at the last minute. The act was allowed to be attached to the bill late at night on a voice vote, and the port security bill was signed into law by President Bush on Friday.

While there are literally millions of Americans that play poker online, I suspect the media initially picked up the story because of the economic ramifications. Online gambling is taxed and regulated in the U.K. and most of Europe. Poker company stocks traded overseas lost around 60% of their price and billions of dollars in market value.

Money is a great quality for any story. It’s one of the Three Media Musketeers, along with sex and violence. Now if only Rockstar Games could create a video game that allows you and a friend to bet on how quickly you can beat-up hookers. They wouldn’t even need a clever name. They could just call it “Money-Hooker-Smash” and make a fortune.

The media’s initial handling of the story made me realize how easy it is to fool editors. Although the act is named, “Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act” the act doesn’t make it illegal to play poker online. It’s still legal. The first 3/5 of the bill’s title is a lie. The law makes it illegal for U.S. banks and credit card companies to directly transfer money to and from overseas online poker sites.

Yet the act’s name says Unlawful, Internet, and Gambling, all in the same sentence. So, according to many news outlets: “Internet Gambling Made Illegal” (or, in a nod to nuance, “Internet Gambling Made Practically Illegal)”

Perhaps it’s unfair to except accuracy immediately in a 24/7 news environment. Check 1: The words were in order. Check 2: Screw it. We got check 1.

If the act was titled, “Gambling Internet Unlawful Act Enforcement Poodle” and the AP ran a photo of a pink poodle in a cop uniform beating up a computer playing poker, then I’d have more of a case.

The arguments against online gambling are absolutely ridiculous and inconsistent with how we treat similar activities. If you can day trade from the privacy of your home for as much money and as long as you want, why can’t you do the same with online poker? You can even play for much lower stacks online than live. The minimum stakes at a casino is usually $1/$2–every online site offers games for $.10/$.20.

Alcoholism is a terrible problem, but that doesn’t mean we should ban alcohol. We tried that before. It’s called…I forget. I had too much to drink tonight. But if our government isn’t going to stop me from crashing my car into a 7-11 and run around the store naked with a Slurpee cup over my crotch, then it has no business trying to discourage people from gambling online.

Most arguments by poker players in support of online poker playing are sound, although some of them try too hard. My favorite is one I heard on a poker radio show: “By letting us gamble at home, it keeps us from driving drunk on the streets.” Way to win the hearts and minds, guys.

There are a lot of interesting background nuggets about the situation.

* Sen. Frist’s motivation. He has been continually pandering to the religious right to secure their support (and dollars) for his Presidential run. Remember Terry Schiavo?

* Anti-gambling groups have been trying to get a bill like this passed for years. One reason they haven’t been able to up until now is because the now-disgraced lobbyist Jack Abramoff worked to prevent any anti-gambling ban that would hurt his clients, the Indian casinos. Abramoff’s work tainted online gambling in a way. “If he defended it, then it must be bad.”

* While the bill is difficult to enforce, and most poker players use third-party payment system already that aren’t affected by the law, public online gambling firms have pulled out of the U.S. market, which is 1/2 of the total online market. The reason is that, as publicly-held companies, their operations and relationships with banks can’t have any hint of illegality or being involved in a legal gray area.

* PartyGaming, a public company with a 50% market share in the U.S., has pulled out of the market, leaving a huge vacuum for private companies to seize.

* Most of poker’s recent popularity has come from televised poker shows. These shows get a significant amount of revenue from online poker sites. It’s unclear how many of these shows will survive now that some companies no longer operating in the U.S. has no reason to advertise in the country.

* There are a lot of angry, life-long Republicans who play poker and say they aren’t voting Republican this year because of the bill. I don’t think it will affect any elections though. There’s a big online tournament on Voting Day.

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McDonalds Sign

Create Your Own McDoanlds Sign (although warning: the site is annyoingly preachy.)

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Google Humor

I just noticed that when I enter my spam folder in Gmail, the program displays ads for spam recipes (Vinegar Span Salad, Savory Spam Crescents…). No ads for Monty Python though.

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Chuck Norris Facts

I actually have some material brewing around in my head, but I’ve been in a lazy mood recently.

Anyway, it’s much easier to post links to other people’s comedy.

Chuck Norris Facts

Hilarious.

“There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.”

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